Mine is either Marvin the Martian, the Tasmanian Devil or Ron Raul. Each has his own unique appeal. Unfortunately none of them are leading candidates for the Republican presidential nomination - though I submit that Taz would be a sure thing to unseat Obama.
Let's review the three loonytoons that are gathering the most attention:
1) Mitt Romney is a man of principles. Seriously, he believe in any and everything whenever it suits him best. The man passed a successful (and right-leaning) healthcare law in Massachusetts and then ran away from it when Obama passed a similar law for the nation. Mitt Romney couldn't distinguish himself from Teddy Kennedy in the early 90s, now he is comparing himself to Sarah Palin and Rick Perry. My gut tells me that Mitt may be a smart guy, but experience shows me that Mitt believes whatever he thinks is en vogue. Right now, it's en vogue to flaunt your stupidity, so Mitt - like his compatriots - looks pretty dumb.
2) Making Mitt look reasonable by comparison is Texas governor Rick Perry, a man who - somewhat like Romney - was a Democrat two decades ago. Unlike Romney, Perry only flip-flopped once. Now his "conservative credentials" are rock solid - the man does not believe in global warming and called Ben Bernake treacherous for trying to spur economic growth. I don't know about you but I don't want my president to accuse those who are trying to stimulate the economy of treason. I also just can't get on board with people who are either too stupid to understand science or willfully choose to ignore it because they're catering to people who are too stupid to understand science. I'm talking to you too Mitt Romney.
3) The Tasmanian Devil is a dark horse but the latest Fox News poll shows him creeping up on third place. As endearing as I find Taz, I feel like the language barrier would be a real problem when trying to address the nation or meet with other heads of states. George W. was enough of a babbler for me; I don't know if I can handle Taz. Also, think about how much it would cost taxpayers to clean and repair the White House after Taz lived there.
4) Michelle Bachmann is perhaps the ultimate Loony Toon. Mitt Romney believes whatever you want him to, Rick Perry actually believes a lot of stupid things, but Michelle Bachmann not only believes the garbage, she practices it. Michelle's family accepts Medicaid money to run a clinic that "heals" gay people through faith. It says a lot about our nation when this qualifies as medicine, but that's a whole other issue. The real problem is that Michelle Bachmann espouses these views. Bachmann is also referred to as the Tea Party's darling which tells you all you need to know about her ability to help the economy. For more on that, check here.
The Republican party has been short on sanity for quite a while, but the field of goons running for president would probably be better of if the Tasmanian Devil was a real candidate. He may not improve the field but he certainly wouldn't dilute it either.
If there is going to be a Republican president, we all better hope it is John Huntsman, or maybe Barack Obama since he's a pretty right of center guy himself.
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